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The Narcissist in Intimate Relationship - A Case Study

It's been several weeks since I added anything new. Today we begin a new series detailing the intimate relationship patterns of those with narcissistic Personality Disorder. This is a case study with some details altered to protect the people involved. What is different is that the NPD in this situation is female - only 25%+/- of NPDs are women.

The Narcissist in Intimate Relationships – A Case Study
Part 1
It started as most relationships do. We will call them Crystal and Brysen. Their eyes met, they smiled, and a conversation started. They laughed and enjoyed each other’s company. They started dating and it very quickly turned romantic. She was the instigator of most things, and he enjoyed the attention she lavished on him.

They were both needy, but in different ways. She had money and he was barely scraping by. She bought him new clothes that he could never afford, including $150 jeans and a $400 pair of cowboy boots. She bought him a used powerboat. He was recently divorced and still dealing with childhood rejection and abuse; there was a deep neediness in him which she sensed and which she catered to, praising him and declaring her undying love. He responded as she hoped, and fell in love with her.

There was a major problem, however; Crystal was married and living with her husband. She claimed they were divorcing. She said that she hated her husband, that he was a terrible man and worse father to their two children. He was stupid and a total loser, but Brysen was an answer to her prayers and she was so thankful for him.

Brysen moved into the house with Crystal the day after her husband finally moved out, even though he was still arriving at various times to rescues his belongings. He said something very curious to Brysen that made sense only much later: Get out while you can, he whispered. Brysen shook off the comment as jealousy and made himself at home.

It was the biggest, most lavish home he had ever had... And the sex was great! Brysen thought he was in heaven.

And then it got even better, or so he thought. Crystal owned several apartment houses and proposed to Brysen that he take over as the primary caretaker/handyman. She would only pay him $14 an hour, but he would not have any housing, food, gas, medical or clothing expenses. Further, she said that she would “cook the books” to make it appear he was earning only minimum wage, which would eliminate Him from paying income taxes, meaning he could get a refund of several thousand dollars every year for his child support payments. Brysen knew less than nothing about tax laws and agreed.

But Crystal had “some anger issues.” She demanded that he have nothing to do with his ex-wife, even though they had three young children and a parenting plan that required them to make mutual decisions in nonemergency situations. Why, he asked? “I hate her,” said Crystal, “and so should you.”

Brysen had had a small business a few years before that he wanted to revive, and began to call his old clients. He also called his ex-wife a few times. Crystal demanded that he give to her his phone and the password. On seeing he had made the calls, she flew into a screaming rage and smashed the phone to the point where nothing could be retrieved. All of his contacts were lost.

Crystal bought him a “new” cell phone and programmed the password herself. Crystal had begun her campaign to isolate him from everyone else and turn him into her psychological slave. Being codependent, Brysen rationalized it all as nothing more than eccentricity. He could not have been more wrong.

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